Monday, November 30, 2009

Perfectly Imperfect

I was thinking the other day (actually it was just five minutes ago, but as every stand up comic knows, it sounds better as "the other day") about how some people focus soooo hard on trying to be perfect and making everyone in the world believe that they are so perfect and everything in their life is so perfect, that they miss out on how perfect, being imperfect, is. Life is a lot easier, the more you are yourself, and the less you are...well, a lier.

I know that my marraige isn't perfect. We fight. OF COURSE we do! Everyone fights. I would be worried if we didn't. So why should I pretend that we don't?

I know my kids aren't perfect (well they are perfect to me, OF COURSE ;-)). But they act out. They are bad when I most want them to be good. They have recently taken to talking back a little...er...more than a little (thank you preschool). Why can't I admit that they aren't perfect all the time and ask for suggestions from other moms with perfectly imperfect kids?

I haven't always gotten along with my in-laws. I really don't think that's something I've cornered the market on....and definitely not in THIS family. They've made me cry and they've made me laugh. Just like my family has. Things got a lot easier when I stopped trying to be the "perfect daughter-in-law" and just started being myself and admitted that our relationsip wasn't going to be perfect, but we all wanted to at least try to make it work.

And more than ANYTHING, I know that I AM NOT PERFECT. I have made many, many, many mistakes in this life and I KNOW that I will be making a million more before it's over. What is so wrong with admitting that? Isn't that what blogging is about? Isn't that what FRIENDSHIP is about? Admitting when things are shitty and getting support from other women who are also perfectly imperfect, and have gone through it too.

Who wants to read a blog written by some self-important, narcissitic, bitch, who thinks the sun shines out her ass? NOT ME! I want to read (and do read) blogs written by women who have stuff go wrong in their lives and can laugh at themselves and their family and friends. Can make fun of how life just isn't perfect. My parents told me to do my best and if I screw up, laugh it off, dust myself off and try again. It doesn't just pertain to falling on your ass in front of the most popular boy in school (which I did...in a skirt...yah). It pertains to marraige, and parenting and friendships and LIFE. Why can't some people get off their high horses and start being HONEST...to EVERYONE? It might make things a lot easier on this family.

4 comments:

andrea said...

ironically similar to my last post!

but ya, I am with you. Aren't the flaws what make us who we are? I think so....

renee said...

lol. i know, right. i was thinking that same thing when i read yours. it's kizmet lol ;-)

Danifred said...

I totally agree- although I love talking about the imperfections, that's what makes life so funny :) On the other hand, there are a couple of blogs I've been struggling through lately because of a huge amount of negativity. I know everyone can do whatever they want with their little slice of the internet, but it does make it hard to read day after day.

Kara said...

totally agree! love this post..