Tuesday, November 24, 2009

No easy way to say toothless

There isn't an easy way to say this...my husband is a hill-billy.

Ok, so he isn't REALLY a hill-billy (does that have a hyphen b/c it's looking kinda weird both ways...). Aaaanywho. The day after we started getting over the swine flu (also known as the worst diet ev.ah.) He started complaining of his front, top tooth hurting. I was like "Wah? front AND top? No, no, no. That can't be." He says "yes, dear wife. front AND top. it hurts like a mo.fo." (yes we are THAT gangsta).

Of course he makes his way to the ONLY dentist that will take him before the world ends on 2012. (please don't get any ideas about my Mayan calendar worship, I actually think that is a bunch of nonsense). So he goes there and comes home in full fledged tears. and toothless. which one of those things is worse, because I honestly can't decide which one needs to be in all caps since they are both so freaking shitty. The girls, sweethearts that they are, got all upset because he was so upset. I get all upset because he looks in the mirror and gets EVEN MORE upset. So I start yelling obscenities at God...or the ceiling (because I'm still slightly confused on whether He is everywhere or just...UP). Anyway, I was a bit irate at our "bad luck" that after 5 years I am still desperately trying to call "bad luck" and not "God hates everyone in this house and is trying kill us". But the basic jist is that when he was a kid he cracked it and all this time it has been dying because it was never fixed. So it chose one month before Christmas to officially "give up the ghost".

This is the point where I would normally "insert photo here". But, sorry, I promised I wouldn't show anyone any pictures. Which I find sort of funny since he's walking around like that, sooo...?? Anyway, I promised and I respect him, so you'll just have to imagine it. Or don't. Yah, DON'T.

So here we are...trying to make jokes about it to keep upbeat. The good part is....he's got a place for straws? Hey, I'm trying here people!! Actually it has been sort of funny since I convinced him to speak with a southern accent to "complete the look". He's definitely getting better at it. LOL.

Ok seriously we are just kinda waiting until we get the money for a new tooth. yah. those things are freaking expensive. So there is a slight chance I'm going to have to get a job on nights and weekends and NEVER see josh and the kids. Yah a big ole (:-P) on that, but it would just be temporary. Honestly I don't know if I could even find a job since it's been almost 5 years since I worked and even then it was during the day because I was a phone answerer extraordinaire. And there is NO WAY I'm going to work during the days and have the kids be raised by someone else. Josh and I decided 5 1/2 years ago that we wanted there to always be one of us home with them and we aren't about to change it now, when they need me the most. So I really don't know what's gonna happen with that. Either way it takes 2 weeks to get the "flipper" back (yes, that is what it's called...listen, I don't name the things, I just buy them). so my dreams of family Christmas pictures are pretty much shot. Which reminds me of another thing Joshy's working on...smiling without showing any teeth.

I wish I was kidding.

4 comments:

Aubrey said...

That's so awful!! I'm so sorry. Hope you find some work soon.

Brandi said...

That poor man! I wouldn't be able to leave the house without one of my front teeth...oh that just sucks. Check with your dentist to see if they accept discount dental plans. My dentist did and I had a bunch of work done for half the price...

Mama Reg said...

awww poor guy. wow you wont believe how much i can relate to this! mike has always had problems with his teeth...one night we were at some peoples house and i didnt even notice but he had stopped smiling. we got home, and he showed me his front tooth, he had chipped 3/4 of it completely off, from biting a burnt fry! it was so sad!! it took us awhile too, it figure out what we would do about it, and how we would pay. but isnt that just true love, no matter what we look like, we always love each other! :)

oh...HAHAHAHA this blog was really witty, "i dont name these things i just buy them" hahaha!!

Danifred said...

Oh no! I feel so bad for him! Poor guy :(